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Hurry! Sign up for this sure-fire fitness plan!!!

Need to lose a few pounds to fit into that swimsuit before the big vacation?
Want to tone up those flabby arms*?
Want to make your core as solid as a rock?
Then I have the workout for you! And it's guaranteed to work ... OR YOUR MONEY BACK!!!
Introducing a revolution in exercise and weight loss ...
Friends, welcome to "CHANGE WILLOW DAILY," the plan that's sure to work for you.
Got a double chin? It will be gone in days! GUARANTEED!!!
Got a spare tire? GONE! In no time!!!
"CHANGE WILLOW DAILY" is a break-through toning plan created by a stay-at-home dad and former Navy SEAL**, Brian Dunn, an expert in the ancient art of baby-changing fitness.
And don't worry that you won't be able to keep up with the system. "CHANGE WILLOW DAILY" is much simpler than those complex systems that boggle your mind! No rubber bands! No racks! No pills!
No! This system is as simple as strapping on Velcro shoes!
EASY!
BREEZY!
And catch this, FRIENDS! The system is ONLY!!! ONLY!!! $19.95***!!!
$19.95***!!!
You heard me right!!!
For less than $1 a day you can shape up and get the body you've always wanted****!!!
So how's the system work, you ask!!!
Simple as putting on a Velcro belt!
Each day members change Willow's diaper. That's it!!! Easy. Easy. Easy! And for just $4.95 more a month, you can upgrade your system to "CHANGE WILLOW DAILY - PLUS," a super-revolutionary plan where you change Willow's clothes once a day
*****!! The pounds will fall right off, friends!
The body of your dreams is only a phone call away!
Just call 1-800-BABY-FIT.
That's 1-800-222-9348!

(Please consult your physician before starting any fitness program).
* SuckersEveryDay Productions is not responsible for arms that actually turn to flab from exertion and fall off.
** Brian Dunn has never been a Navy SEAL, but he feels like one after changing Willow.
*** Per month. All proceeds go to Willow's Daddy's liquor fund.
**** In most cases, the body you've always wanted is so tired from changing Willow's diaper that the body you've always wanted slumps sans energy onto the nearest couch (or floor).
***** The plus system, though once a day, may take up to several hours each day to accomplish.
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