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The Spectacular Thief

It happens before you know it.
You can't stop it. Preventive measures are futile.
Willow has a gift.
She's quick as a ninja. Sly as a fox. Keen as an eagle.
And she puts these skills to good use.
Willow is a spectacular thief.
That is, she is a world-class spectacle stealer.
That is, she snatches eye glasses off people's heads.
I realize Willow isn't alone in this regard; the skill is common among babies.
But I've been studying my little thief, and this is how she does it:
  • She wobbles and falls throughout the day, and she grabs at and misses items she wants. This is meant to lure the target into a false sense of security about their glasses.
  • She fusses and cries at times, sometimes feigning a fall and bump on the head. This is meant to lure the target into picking her up.
  • She either continues to fuss or she unexpectedly smiles or laughs. This is meant to lure the target into a kiss on the cheek.
  • Then ... SNATCH!!! She has them. The spectacles are hers, and the thievery is spectacular.
  • Once the target pulls back the glasses, Willow then plays dumb and even a little hurtful. "Oh, I didn't know I had those in my hands. You didn't have to snatch them back so, so hurtfully."
As I mentioned earlier, preventive measures are futile.
I know Willow's tricks. I know her motives. I know her operation.
And yet I'm powerless to it. I cannot stop it.
So I'll just have to learn to enjoy it. Laugh at her and her mastery over me.
Then maybe she'll grow tiresome of the spectacle.
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